Blessed Light

I’ve been in a deep, dark valley for several months and am seeing lots of sunshine now in the area of parenting. I continually remind myself through my experience that parenting well doesn’t come naturally, and it is not automatic. What makes it more difficult is that as kids mature, practices that worked last year need some adjustments because you are in a different relationship now. And though many principles are good and time-less, parents are not. We begin to let things slide as we get comfortable and busy and lazy.

So, where did the sunshine come from? The first ray was advice from others. My wife was infinitely wise and humble to ask my mother on a recent visit, “What advice do you have for us in the area of parenting?” It takes a daughter-in-law who is confident in the righteousness of Christ to ask such a question (and listen to the critical advice without getting defensive). Proverbs 19:20 says, “Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise.”

Another ray of light came from reading. I’ve been through at least three dark parenting valleys, and each time I’ll pick up a good book. This one was Have a New Kid by Friday by Kevin Leman. Yes, I was that desperate. Actually, it was a gift from my mom—no new earth shattering secrets; only solid reminders and signs for someone who is lost on the valley floor.

A final ray of light came through prayer. I have shared my struggles with each of my small groups and men’s groups, crying out to them for help, prayer and advice (a small group is worthless if you can’t do that). Paul writes to the Corinthian church that, “God will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers (2 Cor 1:10-11).

I have a close friend who has been through an even deeper, darker valley than myself who shared with me how the church has loved him and his wife through their trial. He said, “We actually felt they prayers of the church.”

God, I am weak. May it be that I am helped by the prayers of your church. But even more so, may I pray in such a way, with such passion, such fervency, such belief that others are helped by my prayers, as they are applied by your Spirit.